Im trying to contain my fury... but its not working.
To be blunt-- I dont like America and Im not thrilled about being here. Everyday I ask myself, "why am I back here?". At first I tried to convince myself that it was a good decision. But Im running out of believable positive answers.
What I see is a civilization in its death throes. Some Americans ask, "Why do they hate us?". Im amazed when I ponder, "Why dont they ALL hate us?" Just what the hell do some foreigners admire? In truth... mostly its an image of boundless wealth. In other words, lies and propaganda.
My first impressions are of a sick, infantile society. Americans... and particularly American men... strike me as emotionally and intellectually retarded compared to their Asian peers. My "conversations" with men here have been confined to the following topics:
Dumbass jokes about bodily functions... not unsimilar to the conversations I had when I was 12 years old.
Vile demeaning comments about women.
Idiotic posturing to appear "cool".
Jokes about "fags" or "homos" (which always makes me suspect the teller is repressing something :)
Endless chatter about media virtual-reality (bands, movies, TV shows)... ie. "Did you see Survivor last night. Wow"
That pretty much covers it. I return to my own country... where everyone speaks my native language... and find I have nothing to say to people.... and can't bear to listen to them. I had much better conversations in Thailand and Japan.. with non-native English speakers. They may have struggled for words, but they had ideas. Americans, on the other hand, talk all the time... but say nothing. And so I find myself sitting silently... Occasionally shaking my head and wondering, "How can grown men act like this?"
To escape the awkward silence, the guys will often turn on the TV. Last time, they switched on Comedy Central. For three hours I was bombarded with despicable "jokes" about ethnic stereotypes and insulting comments about women.... this is the American norm for "comedy".
When I walk outside, everywhere I look I see fat people.... overweight, self-indulgent, spoiled, bratty, impatient, cranky.
Within the country, Americans cling to the notion that they live in "the best country in the world". For decades, their immensely powerful media convinced a lot of foreigners of this notion too. But no longer. Americans may still believe the bullshit, but the rest of the world is waking up to the truth. In Europe. In the Middle East. In Latin America. In Asia.
They are seeing what I see. And it aint pretty.